It Wasn’t Love
In today’s For Better or For Worse, Elizabeth Patterson goes through a process I have seen many people do before including me, i.e. evaluate their current relationship based on their prior relationships. Usually the point of these exercises is to show how much better their current relationship is than their prior ones and with Elizabeth Patterson, this is no exception. Then later, if Liz and Anthony get divorced, and Liz remarries, she can make the same comparison with husband #2. I don’t think it is a case of really confirming the current relationship is the best one, as showing that she made the right decision to end the other relationships. At least that is my opinion of the reasons for the comparison, when I think about old girlfriends and say, “I am so happy I didn’t end up with her.”
As such, I cannot truly take this strip as a judgment of the quality of the other relationships. When it comes right down to it, I agree with Elizabeth, at least on the point that Anthony Caine is the best choice for her of all those men. Elizabeth showed this week that she is not above fondling old boyfriends and I expect that of all those men she named, Anthony Caine is going to be the one who would take such behaviour the best. During the March phone call with Elizabeth where Warren interrupted, he did not seem the least bit perturbed that Elizabeth had an old boyfriend in her apartment when he called. In contrast, Paul Wright was obviously upset when he ran into Warren back in December, 2005. Likewise Warren actively sought to eliminate Paul as a rival with his actions in Janary, 2007. As for Eric Chamberlain, he was unaware of Liz’s New Years’ Eve 2002 date with Anthony Caine during their relationship, so I cannot tell. I think that if Warren pops in from time-to-time, or Liz invites all her old boyfriends to her wedding, Anthony is the best guy to put up with that.
Liz wants a homebody who is not going to move, or change jobs, or all those things she criticized Warren for. Anthony is that guy and certainly the other men are not. Of those men, he is the best choice.
Now, whether or not it’s love between Liz and Anthony, that’s a whole different story.
As such, I cannot truly take this strip as a judgment of the quality of the other relationships. When it comes right down to it, I agree with Elizabeth, at least on the point that Anthony Caine is the best choice for her of all those men. Elizabeth showed this week that she is not above fondling old boyfriends and I expect that of all those men she named, Anthony Caine is going to be the one who would take such behaviour the best. During the March phone call with Elizabeth where Warren interrupted, he did not seem the least bit perturbed that Elizabeth had an old boyfriend in her apartment when he called. In contrast, Paul Wright was obviously upset when he ran into Warren back in December, 2005. Likewise Warren actively sought to eliminate Paul as a rival with his actions in Janary, 2007. As for Eric Chamberlain, he was unaware of Liz’s New Years’ Eve 2002 date with Anthony Caine during their relationship, so I cannot tell. I think that if Warren pops in from time-to-time, or Liz invites all her old boyfriends to her wedding, Anthony is the best guy to put up with that.
Liz wants a homebody who is not going to move, or change jobs, or all those things she criticized Warren for. Anthony is that guy and certainly the other men are not. Of those men, he is the best choice.
Now, whether or not it’s love between Liz and Anthony, that’s a whole different story.
posted by howard at 10:04 PM
20 Comments:
Sure, why not? He's the best available who will stay in Milquetoasteborough. I...I...I...I love him.....yes, that's it. I'm not settling at all. I L...L...L...L...L...L...L..Love...I Love Gram -- er, I mean Anthony. Let me not think about this horror -- er, I mean, blessing.
It's not that she doesn't have to think about it, it's that she'd better not think about it because the truth is, love has nothing to do with her marriage to Anthony. It's about finding some drone with the same boring priorities that she has--having a dull life in the suburbs, cranking out babies, with no adventure whatsoever.
Yes, I'm familiar with this kind of ridiculous revisionist history too, although I personally don't do it. I have watched lots of women do it, though, and I'm pretty sure I know why. It's about convincing themselves that they're not sluts for having loved and/or slept with more than one man. "Oh, that wasn't really love" always goes hand-in-hand with denying how many sexual partners they've had. I'm sure Liz will be doing a lot of denying past partners to Anthony. (I'm not sure why men do this. In fact, I'm surprised to hear that they do.)
If Liz would just come straight out and admit she doesn't feel romantic love for Anthony, but knows he is the kind of husband she wants, I would love this storyline. Why oh why does Lynn insist on selling this as a great romantic love? It's bizarre.
James,
Let me not think about this horror -- er, I mean, blessing.
Now, there’s a good reason for not thinking about it.
qnjones
It's about finding some drone with the same boring priorities that she has--having a dull life in the suburbs, cranking out babies, with no adventure whatsoever.
And in case we didn’t get that, we can read through the whole Warren Blackwood bio, where the point that Warren is not taking a stable job and settling down is hammered in, over and over again. By pointing out this “flaw” in Warren, it also emphasizes the idea of why Anthony was chosen. Elizabeth can’t keep saying, “Our relationship didn’t happen because you did this” without also pointing out that if he had done what she wanted, then he would be the guy instead of Anthony. After all, when she returned to Milborough, the first guy she asked out was not Anthony, but Warren.
It's about convincing themselves that they're not sluts for having loved and/or slept with more than one man. "Oh, that wasn't really love" always goes hand-in-hand with denying how many sexual partners they've had.
Somehow I don’t think Liz is denying she loved Warren, Paul and Eric, to convince herself she was not a slut. OK. Maybe Eric, but certainly not Warren or Paul, whom she barely kissed.
I'm sure Liz will be doing a lot of denying past partners to Anthony. (I'm not sure why men do this. In fact, I'm surprised to hear that they do.)
As for men, the reason I suggested in my Blog entry, i.e. to reassure yourself you made the right decision by ending a relationship.
If Liz would just come straight out and admit she doesn't feel romantic love for Anthony, but knows he is the kind of husband she wants, I would love this storyline.
Well, I thought that was where she was until today’s strip.
Why oh why does Lynn insist on selling this as a great romantic love? It's bizarre.
I suspect the reason is because Lynn has devoted so much time to it. She has been doing Liz and Anthony for over 10 years now, and if you put that much time and effort into a romance, you would have to hope it would be an epic love story. And to be honest, if Lynn had never done the Howard Bunt storyline with the Anthony aftermath; then she would have had a much better chance of pulling it off as a great romance.
howard:
if Lynn had never done the Howard Bunt storyline with the Anthony aftermath; then she would have had a much better chance of pulling it off as a great romance.
I know. If we had only seen the occasional thought bubble, we'd have been able to convince ourselves that he was pretty much what John said he was when he announced he was getting divorced: a basically decent and loyal guy who wound up staring at the wreckage of his starter marriage wondering how it all happened. His wistful longings about someohw turning back the clock would be just that: an occasional thing from a man trying his best to make the here and now work. Lynn's attempt at being relevant wrecked her story.
Sorry to be the voice of dissent, but even if the whole Howard thing never happened--the romance doesn't work for me. Both parties are too passive and hesitant, too wooden and standoffish when together. The proposal was like they were creating their own arranged marriage. People in love don't act like that.
As a follow-up to my observation on Elizabeth's splitting tendencies the other day, I now think that she demonstrates some traits of the borderline personality disorder:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borderline_personality_disorder
She clearly doesn't actually have the full personality disorder or fit enough of the DSM-IV criteria, but a few points on the criteria list made me raise an eyebrow as I thought about Elizabeth.
qnjones, I agree. Lynn would have needed to do many things differently in order for the Lizthony pairing to be an actual romance. Have them get to know each other in their current [nominally] adult state. How did university and teaching in Mtig change Liz? How did a failed marriage and being a parent change Anthony? What interests do they share in common?
Making out in the bushes during a wedding and then having passionless dates does not equate with romance. Nor does shrugging into engagement after Warren makes an out-of-character appearance in Nizzie's life. 0_o
Anon
It looks to me like Liz definitely fits four of the nine DSM-IV criteria listed in the article you linked (1, 2, 3, and 6). One could also argue that she meets criterion 4, in that almost all her major decisions lately have been made on impulse. Could it be that Lynn is going for another award by portraying the devastating effects of living with mental illness?
qnjones,
Sorry to be the voice of dissent, but even if the whole Howard thing never happened--the romance doesn't work for me.
I am sure you know that I am not saying that Liz and Anthony have anything that seems like a romance. I am thinking in terms of what would be required to make it a romance with the Howard Bunt attack and aftermath with Anthony tainting it. I am not sure anything could.
aprilp_katje suggests having them “get to know each other in their current [nominally] adult state.” That would not do it for me. In my mind, once Anthony did his “I have no home!” speech, he confirmed that Thérèse was justifiably jealous of Elizabeth. Not only that, but the man was trying to replace the mother of his child, when the child was only 5 months old. From that time forward, he has been a true villain in my eyes, more selfish than even the most selfish characters intentionally written that way in other strips. I cannot see any way Lynn Johnston could have redeemed that character in my eyes. But, if that scene had not happened, then she would have had a chance, and aprilp_katje’s suggestions might work.
Now, if Lynn Johnston wanted to write a great story, then she would show Liz and Anthony spending enough time with each other for Liz to realize what the guy was really like, and also to realize that having a steady job and not wanting to move are not the most important qualifications for a good husband. Not only that, a scene where Elly and John come to the same realization, and understand that they have been pushing their daughter on a slimeball all these years, would be several shades of fantastic. There are tons of women out there who are sick and tired of the so-called “nice guy” who isn’t all that nice, and Anthony Caine was a grand opportunity to show that story.
Paladin,
Criterion 4 with the binge eating is possible. There have been a few moments with Elizabeth. Even with the recent strips with Warren Blackwood, she pulls out the chips when they are drinking coffee.
Criterion 8 is also possible, when you consider the spitting at Warren’s phone, the shrieking when her mother or father tried to talk to her about her love life, and of course, more than a little physical violence against April.
Too bad there is nothing in there linking excessive nose growth to a personality disorder, because I think in the FOOBiverse, there is probably a link.
But, if that scene had not happened, then she would have had a chance, and aprilp_katje’s suggestions might work.
I should have been more clear--I meant my suggestions within the context of the Howard Bunt attack/"I have no home" sequence never having happened. I agree completely that Anthony's actions and words during that sequence earned him villain status.
Now, if Lynn Johnston wanted to write a great story, then she would show Liz and Anthony spending enough time with each other for Liz to realize what the guy was really like, and also to realize that having a steady job and not wanting to move are not the most important qualifications for a good husband. Not only that, a scene where Elly and John come to the same realization, and understand that they have been pushing their daughter on a slimeball all these years, would be several shades of fantastic. There are tons of women out there who are sick and tired of the so-called “nice guy” who isn’t all that nice, and Anthony Caine was a grand opportunity to show that story.
This would go a long way toward redeeming her in my view. I think I could actually forgive her for "I have no home" and "wait for me" if she took this turn. And if Liz realized she needed to leave Milbo in order to reach her full potential, that would be a bonus.
I think today's strip (May 17) alone demonstrates 2, 3, and possibly 1.
howard
I had thought of applying criterion 8 to Elizabeth, but couldn't remember her attacking anyone but April. I wasn't sure if that could be used as evidence of mental illness as opposed to just being part of the Pattersons' disfunctional family life.
The nose is an interesting theory. Perhaps their noses are also growing inward; expanding into the skull and putting pressure on the brain. The section of the brain above and behind the nose is the cerebrum, which is usually recognized as the seat of our decision-making ability and personalities. Perhaps the early onset of this previously unknown medical condition is the cause of Elizabeth's recent poor choices and retconned personality.
I might be wrong on this, but didn't Liz attack Eric after she found out about his infidelity?
aprilp_katje,
And if Liz realized she needed to leave Milbo in order to reach her full potential, that would be a bonus.
It would be a bonus. I have never been that troubled by Milborough itself. The strips when Liz moved back in with her mother, especially the scene where she was lying in her bed in the fetal position, full of self-pity over her situation, bothered me the most. In real life, what would happen is that Liz would make friends among the teachers, the students and the students’ parents like regular teachers do, and like Liz did in Mtigwaki with Jesse Mukwa. If Lynn showed just a little of Liz developing a social life over and above her mother and the friends she knew in high school, I think that would be enough for me.
Paladin
Perhaps their noses are also growing inward; expanding into the skull and putting pressure on the brain.
Interesting idea. It might explain why Elly seems more erratic, the bigger her nose is.
Anonymous,
I think today's strip (May 17) alone demonstrates 2, 3, and possibly 1.
I would go with 2 and 3 for sure. 1 doesn’t work for me because Elizabeth doesn’t seem frantic.
I might be wrong on this, but didn't Liz attack Eric after she found out about his infidelity?
No, you are not wrong about this. Liz and Tina knocked Eric to the ground and beat him with their fists.
I recently stumbled upon your blog and really enjoy your incites on the Patterson's. I've followed the strip since I could read, I'm 21 now, and always enjoyed reading the strip. But the story lines that were once interesting now seem more forced and contirved. And the whole Liz/Anthony storyline has left are particulary bad taste in my mouth.
Anyway onto my main thought on this particular strip. Panels 1-4 clearly are meant as an attempt to quell the whole "love" debate among reader's. However it's panel 5 that sends of a red flag to me. I think the intention was to make it seem that Liz' choice in Anthony was so easy i.e. "it just feels right" it requires little thought beyond that. I see it more as Liz trying not to analyze further her true feelings and doubts about the situation she is in. Even when Lynn penned those few strips trying to explain away why Anthony's first marriage failed there was hardly any accoutability put on Anthony. And Liz has been reluctant to mention how Anthony was ever possibly at fault in his own right as a husband. It seems she has set her mind into deny mode in order to please others wants for her personal life namely Elly Patterson. In other words "I have my token of love so that must make it right. My mother wants this so therefore I must want this. End of debate."
Also a thought on the BPD theory with Liz I automatically connected this line from the article "The most consistent finding in the search for causation in the disorder is a history of childhood trauma..." to this http://www.fborfw.com/strip_fix/archives/003015.php
Sorry if this a bit long winded.
Ruth
Ruth
I recently stumbled upon your blog and really enjoy your incites on the Patterson's.
Thanks and welcome to the Howard Bunt Blog.
I think the intention was to make it seem that Liz' choice in Anthony was so easy i.e. "it just feels right" it requires little thought beyond that. I see it more as Liz trying not to analyze further her true feelings and doubts about the situation she is in.
Justifying a choice to a readership, often comes across as justifying a choice to yourself, when the character cannot be displayed actually addressing the readers. That’s the problem with this thought balloon technique.
Even when Lynn penned those few strips trying to explain away why Anthony's first marriage failed there was hardly any accountability put on Anthony.
True. As far as accountability goes, there is plenty to go around. Not only Anthony, but Elizabeth herself. As often as Liz cried her innocence, Lynn still depicted Elizabeth again and again in close embraces and holding hands with Anthony. Neither one of them has dealt with their part in destroying Anthony’s marriage to Thérèse. Neither one of them has addressed the fact that they still have this behaviour, as we saw this past week with Elizabeth fondling Warren Blackwood.
It seems she has set her mind into deny mode in order to please others wants for her personal life namely Elly Patterson.
True enough. Even the way it was portrayed in the strip, it was as if Anthony was the final and reluctant choice for Elizabeth, even though Elly was pushing them together for years, including when Anthony was married.
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